SMARTPHONES HAVE changed all our lives, sure.
But they’ve also turned us into creatures of habit. Ridiculous, ridiculous habits.
1. Pacing
When you began your phone call, you were in your living room. When you hung up, you were halfway down the main road.
2. Leaving a certain amount of time before answering a text
Wait five minutes before responding. Even if it’s your mam. Can’t be looking like you have nothing better to do than reply to texts.
3. Panicking over a private number
You haven’t done anything wrong. No one wants anything from you. But still:
4. Hearing a phone buzz and immediately leaping on yours
The. Actual. Desperation.
5. Checking every five seconds
No one’s texting you or tweeting you or Facebook messaging you. But just in case they DID.
6. Texting and walking
The desire to tweet is stronger than the fear of walking into a lamppost, evidently.
7. Bringing it into the jacks
Unless you want to be in there for the best part of an hour, don’t do it.
8. Browsing while watching TV
Look down for a minute during a dull bit, and look back up to find the entire episode has passed without you noticing.
9. Text amnesia
Receive text. Unlock phone. Check Facebook, Twitter, Instagram. Lock phone. Remember the text, and curse yourself.
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